Entries that were not picked

Example 2

-SARS came. My daughter fell ill and died. It was a heavy breakdown to my family. My neighbours all came to visit her when she was ill, sending blessings to her, hoping the recovery. Thus, when she died, the neighbours too were devastated.
-After the outbreak, Singapore considered measures to prevent citizens from getting infected with the deadly virus with a daily thermometer exercise for everyone. Everyone did their part to protect their own health and looked out for one another. It was touching. The neighbours and I became closer together and lived beyond my daughter's passing.
-The 2008-2009 Economic breakdown shed the citizen's careers. (many people lost their jobs) (my neighbour lost his job and now I had an even greater burden-I needed to have sufficient funds for both my neighbour and my family) Thankfully, I found a job for them and our ties were even closer this time.
-We both attended the racial harmony day celebration at the community centre. We wore traditional costumes, met people with different skin colours, different faces and different accent.This reminded us of the 1964 racial riots. People fought because they had different faces and religion. They looked at each other differently and did not respect and approve of each other's culture. This served as a great reminder to fellow Singapore as they commemorate the special day as a end of inequality between different races. Our manpower, soldiers and workers are made up many people and Singapore would never survive without them. My neighbour and I chattered endlessly as we munched on our food while interacting with other races and our laughter continued! Explanation: how everyone can come together to overcome various crisis and stay as one through moral support which relates to topic: together we keep singapore strong.

Why this entry was not picked:

  • There is a lot of stuff going on here - most of it perfect, textbook answers - but the meaning that ties them up together isn’t expressed strongly (or clearly) enough.
  • Each of the scenes that are suggested sound like they would take quite a bit of time to play out on screen. It is not likely for all of them to fit into a 30 second or even 60 second animation.
  • The way that the examples are presented are either ‘easy’ or ‘already solved’. As such, there is nothing that captures the reader’s attention to ask, “What happens next” or to say, “That is remarkable”.